Merry Month of May

The month of May has changed for me. 

Last year on May 13th, 2015, I almost lost my life to a DVT and PE. Thankfully, a doctor named Tex Cabaniss saved me. I had NO IDEA how serious it was at the time and I know that was God's protection. If I had known, I think I would have freaked out and it would have made it hard for my body to stay calm. I was in so much pain and oblivious to the seriousness. All I cared about was when my next pain meds were coming and if I could have coffee with my breakfast. TRUTH. 

As of April 13, 2016, the clot is back in a smaller form. Today I saw my doctor and found out I am on Xarelto for "probably" life. I have a check up appointment and leg ultrasound in 3 months. I've been told to put my bed on bricks to elevate my leg. I must wear my compression stockings and supportive (not as cute) shoes. BUT, there are lots of things to be thankful for too. I'm not in the hospital. I don't have to be on a heparin drip. I can walk and exercise. It's okay to have a drink as long as it's just one every now and then. I have a doctor who is wicked smart and kind nurses. I am thankful that God saved my life last year, and one little non-occlusive clot is not going to stop me from being who I am this year. 

My sweet encouraging sister, Amber, sent me the quote on the right to me today after my appointment. I so needed it. My previous post talked about intentional discomfort and just to show how "uncomfortable" I was, I didn't even post it on FB like I usually do. LOL! Seriously y'all, I got scared. I feel like a middle schooler in some ways, a kid in some, and a middle aged woman who longs for who own family in other ways. This is a strange time for me. I am waiting for things. It's no secret I am looking for a new job. I thought I had one in the bag in March, but God had other plans. In April, I was offered a job, then they had to resend because of the district. 

So, now I wait. 

It's also no secret I am not getting any younger. I am as single now as I was when I turned 21. Life is not meant to be lived alone and I pray for the day I will get to share it with someone.

Until then, I wait. 

In the waiting time, I have been blessed with sweet support. My mom, Amber and Scarlett have encouraged me, prayed for me, listened to me vent, read my long text messages asking for help and have loved me JUST AS I AM. That is huge to me. They have let me be myself and figure out what the heck is going on in my life. Amber takes pictures for B Love Photography, buys my dinner, gives me massages and provides a refuge at her home in Spring. Thank you, Amber. Mom has made Sundays better because I go to church and lunch with her. When I ask Millie on Sunday mornings, "Are you ready to see Grammy and Bud-Bud?", she runs and jumps like a little bronco. Thank you, Mom. Scarlett has cooked me dinner, listened to me rant, let me bring Millie over, and been there to make me laugh. Thank you, Scarlett. 

And then of course, there is Millie. She is the sunshine in my day. I love that pup more than I can explain. She is a snuggler and I so need snuggles. She is a fun dog that makes me laugh and I need laughter! She is my friend and I need a good friend right now. 

Love,

Brandee

"Your body is just special..."

Based on my blog title, you might think I'm going to pull an Elisabeth Elliot on you, but I'm not. If you don't know about EE, she was an amazing author and missionary, but in college her book, Passion and Purity, became like a religion. Check out more here.

 Amazingly, this is a direct quote from my sweet sister, Amber! And y'all it's so true. My body does its own thing...it does not follow doctor's rules. If a medicine is going to have an unusual side effect, it will probably happen to me. 

So this Monday, I woke up in the middle of the night with leg pain that felt oddly familiar. It was like a Charlie horse, but more intense. The only other time I felt that was May 13 when I went to the ER for a DVT (deep vein thrombosis). Thanks to the advice of our amazing school nurse, Merrie, I called the doctor Tuesday and explained what happened. They arranged a leg ultrasound right away. I went in at 3:30 p.m. and I was told by phone everything was clear. When I went in today the nurse practitioner said something different...I do have a blood clot, but it's not blocking anything. SO thankful! The official paper work (that I don't really understand) is below...

Official Paperwork 

After being called a "starter" when I proudly showed my tattoo at the Teen Book Con author reception, I've been thinking about the new tattoo I wanted. Sadly, I missed my tattoo window for now, but Amber said it just gives us more time to design it. :-) You can't get tattoos while you're taking blood thinners, and starting tomorrow, I'll be taking a 21 day dose of Xarelto while my d-dimer is being processed. I still don't know exactly what a d-dimer is other than that it tells how well my blood is or is not clotting. The good news is that I don't have a blockage; I don't have to be hospitalized; I don't have to have Coumadin blood levels read every week; and I have a great doctor and even better nurse practitioner! So there's a lot of good news. The not-so-good-news is that I have to get back on blood thinners and they have no idea why the clot formed. My last ultrasound was clear in August. So the way I see it is that this is one chance to have faith while I'm in a waiting time.

And of course no post is complete without Millie. This sweet girl got a bath last night and then slid in the mud today on our walk, but I don't mind. She is such a snuggle bug and I am INCREDIBLY thankful that she is part of my life!! Just look at her face - it's pure love. 

Thanks for reading - I'm realizing this is a great way for me to process what is going on in my life. 

Love,

Brandee 

Grace

This face~

My Saving Grace.

On days when life is rough~

This Girl lets me know I am enough.

Her eyes, love and cuddles~

Erase the day's struggles.

Because she is sensitive to how I am feeling~

Her compassion for me is healing.

I couldn't ask for a better guide~

To show me how to love my life. 

so far...

Family Fun at Corpus

Since my last post, we had a family trip to Corpus, a blue moon, lots of Millie time, summer Bible study and a fun last HURRAH before I go back to work Wednesday! Yes, Wednesday! 

Corpus 
I loved being at the beach, listening to the waves, and teaching Jenna and Ben how to "jump" the waves like my sisters and I did when we were younger. Lots of sandcastles were built, holes were dug and a fun time was had on the beach! In the house, we took turns on meals. I have to say I got off pretty easy. I didn't cook breakfast once and I only had to make dinner once, which Andrew graciously ended up doing on the grill. It was a real blessing to be treated so well. Thanks guys! 

 


My favorite part of the trip was watching the sea turtle release at the National Seashore. It was beautiful and so special to be a part of it. I am not a morning person, but I was so excited to be there at 6:45 a.m. I'll never forget whispering in Ben's ear - "It's time to get up for the turtles" and then seeing his blond curls POP UP in bed. "Ok, let's go!" Jenna was more like me, she stayed in her pjs and was unimpressed until the main event. I think we all enjoyed it and it was a special event to share as a family. 

 


Another fun adventure was family pictures. Amber is gifted in photography and she brought her tripod and told us how to color coordinate beforehand and boy did the pictures turn out great?! Keeping Jenna, Ben and Uncle Andrew involved was a challenge, but we did and it turned out to be a blast!

 


Blue Moon, Millie, and Bible study
Lance was kind enough to keep Millie and Jett while we were at the beach, but Millie was glad to be home and I was glad to have her back! We've been on walks to explore a new park, sat outside to watch the blue moon and had lots of snuggle time. Too bad she won't be able to go to work with me. :-( Another blessing this summer has been Bible study. A friend invited me and I honestly was out of the loop. It has been such a blessing to have sisters pray for me and over me as I battle through my health issues and emotions. I am so grateful for them and each Wednesday night we meet. 

 

HURRAH
Today, I met Scarlett and the kids for one last summer HURRAH! We bowled, played skee ball and LASER TAG! It was great fun and lots of special prices. With our tickets, we all went home with a bracelet! Jenna got a bouncy ball and Ben got a dinosaur. It was lots of fun. To top off the day we enjoyed a yummy lunch at Rudy's bbq and then went our separate ways. I'm so thankful that we got to have one last day of fun and that I convinced Scarlett to play laser tag and then she DOMINATED! ;-)

 

Love,
Brandee

#milliemoo

How is already the middle of July? Time has gone by so quickly since my last post. I still continue to be amazed and filled with gratitude and the friends and provision God has given me as I recover and heal from these crazy blood clots! 

Millie came home after staying with the Jeans & Jett out in Spring for almost six weeks. She lost some weight, got some new moves to play with Pogo, and had a good time antagonizing Jett. I am happy to have her and I am pretty sure she is glad to be home. We just got back this afternoon from a trip out to see everyone! Thank you so much to Amber & Andrew for loving on Millie and watching over her until I felt strong enough to welcome her home. It was a true blessing for me. Amber captured some great pictures of Millie and would send them to me almost every day!

 
 


July was filled with a lot of thunderstorms. I made my first "real" grocery store trip by myself and the weather was fine. When I came out, it was pouring rain and I had no umbrella! I survived though and was thankful to have Millie waiting home for me. I think she knew that I needed watching over - she jumped in the car and made sure I got all the groceries out in the pouring rain and then zipped in the house. As you can see, I have a great love for this little pup, Millie. She is a blessing to me and such a snuggler!

Today on the way home we stopped at the famous, Denovo coffee. Sadly there is not one here in Houston, but I love going to the one in Spring. Auntie treated us to drinks and then Millie even got a VERY special puppy latte. Check out her eyes! I think she has hit a sugar coma because she's been sleeping or fighting it since we got home! So thankful to the Jeans who introduced Boston Terriers into the Smith family. They sure are fun and make great friends! 

Love, 

Brandee

coming home

Millie is coming home today and I am beside myself with happiness. Auntie and Uncle Andrew have taken amazing care of her since my blood clot on May 13th and I haven't had to worry about her one bit. I'm so thankful for their kindness, generosity, pictures and videos that have kept me smiling. Even as I'm writing this, I got a picture from Amber with a message saying, "I'm coming home. Love, Millie". She is a rascal yes, but she's a lover, snuggler and is ALWAYS happy to see me! What more can you ask for?! 
Happy Friday!
Love,
Brandee

2015 so far...

It's hard to believe that we are in mid-April of 2015! Looking back over my blog, I barely posted, I mean really I only wrote five posts. A lot has happened since then. 

1. I have a new dog now - Millie. She is an adorable and snuggly Boston Terrier! 

2.  I got to see Sarah McLachlan in concert at Jones Hall with the Jeans! Amazing show and beautiful set. 

3.  I celebrated Endometriosis Awareness Month by hosting a last minute but FUN walk in Houston at my school track! Also changed all my social media pictures yellow for awareness. 

4.  I've had play dates with my sweet niece and some of them included Millie. :) This one was at the dog park and Millie kept good watch over J.   

5. I've had play dates with my nephew who loves to take selfies. He gets so focused on taking the picture that he forgets to smile. ;-)

6. We've met as a family for PIZZA fun because Aunt B had coupons and it turns out we couldn't use any of the coupons! We had a great time anyway!

7. My sweet sis Amber made an Endo Photo Challenge via Instagram and it meant so much to me! 

8. I got to take students to SHS to hear Matt de la Pena - it was amazing and the 8th grade girls are in love. See the tall and handsome guy in the middle? That's him!

9. Millie is a snuggler. I love this time of day with her. It is usually after dinner and before bed - I'm either reading a book and watching TV on the couch and she is at my feet. Melt my heart. 

10. And this post would not be complete without the reminder of how BLESSED I am to work as a librarian in SBISD! I am so thankful for my job and thankful for the time at SFA!